朋友们快来帮帮修改一下英语演讲稿，拜托拜托，万分感谢

朋友们快来帮帮修改一下英语演讲稿，拜托拜托，万分感谢

MY WAR, MY BUSINESS
Good evening, Ladies and Gentlemen. Today my topic is about the war we will come across one day. First, before my speech I must point out that I am not a man who desires for a war, neither an ambitious man like Hitler.Here,I am not advocating a war, but I want to tell a fact that we must manage to control it once it comes and make efforts to become a stronger country so that we are able to protect ourselves.
After the Vietnam War，Americans had been the winners for 9 times. They claimed that they will be the policemen of the world, but in fact a king. Then who is the man driving the carriage of the war? It is not Napoleon, because he failed, and it will not be the Americans either, just because it will also be defeated .It is the disciplines of the war.

实在很多啊,,有些写的不是很清楚啊...

Someone once said that there was no peace period to a soldier, but there was only the period in war and the period prepared for the war. It is so difficult and painful for the soldiers living in the preparing period. It is decided by the honor, the emotion and the mission of the military . What our honorable soldier considers day and night, is just that how we can win the next war. How the future war will be called for our more and more deep thinking. In the 21th century ,as the fast development and wildly use of the high technoledges in army and the way in which armies defeat each other has changed a lot and finally became a new revolution of the world militaries . The war based on information will be the war that mostly occurred, instead of the wars base on machinery that was commonly found in the earlier centuries. The most importance is that it requires us to have a high education of ourselves, and if we do not have, we will fail. To account for the war. Taking playing games for an example. When we play, who decide how we will be? It is the one who plays best. Maybe the American just think like this, so they train themselves just in the way they fight in the real battle. By this way they test their disciplines in practice and go ahead of other countries in the new military revolution. But the problem is that if we can play better than the American! If we can win them we will say: it is my war, it is my business!
Who can say that our country will be peaceful forever? No one. As we all know that the situation of our country is not so good as we thought: the people who desire separate Taiwan from our mainland still very crazy and will not drop the thoughts. Americans settle their soldiers around our country desiring to isolate ,encircle and contain our country ; Japan refuses to admit its evil war action once hurt the people in the East Asian countries, the boundary problem between china and India is still up in the air and tens islands in the south ocean(南海) are still captured by other countries…….. As the man who will decide the future war, we must take up the mission on our shoulder ,and complete the assignment of integrating our country. We all will stand out without any doubt when it is necessary.In this blessed land,we should believe that there is always a better day tomorrow.
So, my friends, for the coming war, are you ready?

很有思想的一篇文章,我只是在你原有的句子上改正了,仅做参考吧...

问题确实很多...建议您按照大家说的先简单修改下.看的有点晕.....

先指出问题,再修改.
指出: 一般用point out,而非point
野心勃勃的:用形容词ambitious, 楼主用的是名词ambitio
希特勒的名字拼写是hitler.
Americans既然是复述,后面应该用have而非 has
老美打赢是过去某一时刻已经完成的事情,所以用过去完成时态had 而非 has.
指代国家一般用it, 既然没什么好感，也大可不必将之拟人话而称为he

好多语法错误啊...看得人眼睛直哆嗦....
随便列出一些..
1.before my speech I must point that 那个point 后面要加个out好些.
2.neither an ambition man like hetele 那个anbition是名词,改成形容词ambitious 好些..
3.control the war once it come 那个come后面要加S.因为是单数三人称..
4.try every effort to 词组用错了..是make every effort to
5.Americans has been the winner for 9 times. 那个Americans是美国人的意思,,,要改成The American或者The U.S.
6.He decline that he will be the policeman of the world...那个decline用得真可怕..是衰退的意思啊."宣称"应该是declare吧..还有单数三人称也没见你加S...汗~
改一下吧:He declares that he will be the policeman of the world.
7.and it also not will be the Americans 这一句的the Americans也要改成The American或US才好..因为你后面用的是it,,,不然单复数会不一致..
8.It is the disciplines of the war that dominate everying of the war.
你这句是什么意思???/看不懂..
战争的纪律统治着所有的战争??
怀疑应该是:It is the disciplines of the world that dominate everything of the world...
我尽力了...你看着办吧...
演讲...真替你的评委老师担心...