急需英语小故事，帮帮忙

找一篇英语小短文，要幽默中带着哲理，简短，1分钟以内的，带翻译，最好有外籍人员录音，实在没有也行，要吸引人的 谢谢谢谢谢谢谢.......

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Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."

伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？” “一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。 “再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。