英语相声2人，要长，好笑，至少10分钟

英语相声2人，要长，好笑，至少10分钟

A: Good morning everyone, today I will play a short crosstalk with my partner„Where is him?
B (run up quickly, very tired): Good morning„ A: You are late! We are all waiting for you!
B: Oh, I am sorry, but it was an accident, I caught a car accident on my way here and I am still alive! A: What did you say? A car accident?
B: Yeah. At that time, I was riding my bike, then suddenly I found that my bike wasn’t under my control. I wanted to stop it but I didn’t see a bus on the right of me, then, then„that bus hit me and I fell down.
A (with the mouth open): A, a, a, a bus? You said a bus hit you?
B: Yes, it is true!
A: Didn’t you get hurt!
B: Of course I did not, because that bus was parking there! At that time, I told me I must be dead. I did not understand until someone shouted “Do you want to take a free bus?” A: Were there any passengers on it?
B: No, nobody...
A: Ok, that was good.
B: But the bus driver was on it, and he looked out of the
window and said: “Look out, boy, it’s dangerous! Anyway, my bus do not carry bikes!”
A: You were lucky, but you have to know, there are also many moving buses„
B: You think I am stupid? Of course I know, and I also know, you will say: “these moving buses are all dangerous„”, right?
A: I mean you have to be more careful. We leant much at school. Don’t you forget, you cannot ride a bike so fast, and they are also our school rules.
B: I know! I know this and that. I know to be careful, and I also know the traffic rules, just like I know how many fingers I have.
A: But I don’t think only to know some traffic rules is enough. If you only know them but not obey them, will you have to drive a tank to keep yourself safe from danger? B: I really want to tell you: I know that, I never ride my bike in the school, I never cross the road without seeing left and right, and I even give seats to the elderly on the bus! Is that ok?
A: You always do that?
B: Er, sometimes, but there are some other seats on the bus.
A: I mean, you are always obeying the traffic rules? B: Usually.
A: What do “usually” mean?
B: Sometimes I do not obey them... But not too often, that’s not a problem!
A: No, that’s a very big problem. I have a friend. He is really good. He does well in every subject. He is polite to everyone and he is „
B: Wait„
A: He is helpful. He always helps lost children„ B: Hey„
A: And sometimes he wants to„
B: Stop!
A: He doesn’t want to stop working hard, you have to know. B: Is it about our talking?
A: Oh, I forgot! OK, one day, he was on his way home. He saw the traffic lights red. But he wanted to go home quickly to do something important. Then a car hit him, and he stayed in hospital for half a year.
B: How terrible!
A: You said that’s not a problem. But do you really know, there are about 100, 000 Chinese died in traffic accidents. Every 5 minutes, one person died. And every minute, one person hurt himself and cannot live as a common man any more. Do they really know the importance of being careful with cars? Of course they know! But they just think like you. They do not think to be fast or to be careless for several times is a problem. But maybe just for one or two seconds faster, they lost their lives!
B: Is that true? That cannot be the fact!
A: Yes, and I also tell you, 20 percent of the accidents were on students.
B: How terrible! How can we protect ourselves?
A: We know many traffic rules, and all of us know how to do it. But when we are on the road, we forget them all! If we only know the rules but not to use them, they will be useless!
B: I understand that. We must not only know these traffic rules, but also use them. We must be careful every day, every time, because even a very small mistake can take our lives away.
A: That’s good, I am very happy that you know that. I hope more and more people can know that. And if we all know that, much fewer people will die in the accidents. There must be fewer and fewer accidents, too!
B: That’s all right. Let’s tell others about these and then, as you say, our world will be more beautiful.
A: OK! Let’s go!
B: Oh, wait a moment, I want to see that bus driver again. A: That bus driver? Why?
B: I know how to say to that rude bus driver.
A: What?
B: I will tell him: “Your bus can carry a bike, but my bike cannot carry a bus! Be careful, Sir!”